a struggle with words

sometimes i find that fiction can provide some worthwhile lessons for real life. i remember specifically from one movie, called finding forrester, that the writer instructs his protege to begin typing one of the writer's own published works until the words flow freely from the young man instead. i've been struggling a great deal with the writing section of my test. i thought that this would be the easiest part for me, given that i actually enjoy composing. so, i am trying to take that advice and at least get my fingers in the rhythm of hitting those keys and my mind in the rhythm of accessing and processing.

i admit that i am not all that articulate without my dictionary and thesaurus. i just feel that there are often words that more accurately describe what i want to say. i also have a tendancy to enjoy verbosity. i don't intend that my writing appear inflated or presumptuous, but i like the way it sounds when things flow in a melodic way, and sometimes "big" words flow better than smaller ones. one of my problems is also feeling the need to edit and re-edit as i write. i assess previous sentences before i even have the opportunity to finish my original thought. i don't know exactly why that is, but i am going to have to break that habit quickly.

i've never liked writing timed essays but i know that i definitely cannot afford to remain disliking them if i intend to write them well. i need to be open-minded and creative instead. but, it is difficult to be that way when you must follow instructions and write about pre-determined topics, especially ones unrelated to my field of interest. i'm finding that the most common theme in the writing samples is politics.

i need to start practicing seeing things from two different perspectives. it is easy to give in to bias and prejudice. but, i can't do that. i need to see things for what they are and allow myself to imagine how the two differeing perspectives can be united in some way. my dear. this will be a challenge.